We Can't Work on Our Relationship if We're Not Together...

Your world’s been rocked. Unexpectedly, and inexplicably, your most treasured relationship has shattered. Now, all you want to do is run and hide. Escape. Recoup and regroup. Doing so is instinctive, a form of self-preservation. After all, the one you love has betrayed you. The wound is so deep, so open, that recovery seems impossible. Worst of all, you never saw it coming.

‘We can’t work on our relationship if we’re not together.’

 In confronting their crumbling marriage, and his accountability for falling to the call of sin, Kellen’s words to Juliet form the crux for everything that follows. Temptation has won a battle, but should it claim victory over their relationship? Think about that question in terms of your Christian faith and belief system.

Should Juliet run? If she does, what does it mean for the viability of a relationship that is placed in a painful form of suspense?  Should Juliet stay with him as they attempt to sort through their problems? If she does, is that saying she accepts and condones Kellen’s behavior?

If Kellen is sincere in his reform and return to God, should Juliet trust him again? Why or why not? In your view, could Juliet ever again function from the position of a freely given heart? What would need to happen, in your opinion, for Kellen to win her back completely, and authentically reestablish the bonds of their relationship?

What would you consider to be initially understandable reactions to marital betrayal? How would you feel about staying with a spouse who dishonored your vows? Christian marriage is founded on a covenant. A forever bond. Think about that in relationship to this story as you read it, and analyze how you feel about that perspective as the story develops. The tasks before them aren’t easy. Roadblocks, many of which they weren’t even aware of, need to be confronted and dealt with, but in unity. Together.

Attempting to rediscover and reestablish the strength of emotion that drew them together in the first place comes into focus as Kellen and Juliet explore their marriage. How has turning back to someone who wronged you fortified the relationship you share? How has extending forgiveness reshaped a damaged relationship in your life? Describe the process. Did it evolve over time, as trust was reestablished, or was forgiveness attained promptly and readily?

Now, turn that question the other way and ask yourself, how has the process of being forgiven—authentically and fully—reshaped the way you love someone whom you’ve wronged? Describe that process as well.

Scriptural Contemplation/Reflection:

Read Matthew 1:18-21

Consider the covenant between Joseph and Mary—the earthly parents of Christ. Consider the way God touched Joseph’s heart, encouraging him to honor his commitment to her, and love her despite all outward circumstance. Joseph had every “right” to divorce her, to run and hide and escape much like Kellen and Juliet. He opts to stay on the course God ordains…though it is not the easier path.

And I will betroth you to me forever. I will betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in steadfast love and in mercy.  Hosea 2:19 (NIV)